Blue Haven (Sunshine & Shadow Book 1) Read online

  Lex placed both hands on April’s face, brushing her hair back. He turned her head up so he could look into her eyes.

  “So now what?” Lex whispered.

  April sighed. She let her hands wind under the bottom of his shirt and around his belt. She didn’t need to say anything to let him know what she was thinking.

  He pulled away to stare at her, kissing her closed lids one at a time. “Are you sure?” he whispered against her delicate skin.

  April nodded. Lex’s arms squeezed around her waist keeping her pressed against his chest, so she couldn’t undo his belt. She groaned into his neck and he vibrated with gleeful laughter.

  “Calm, April,” Lex whispered into her ear. April shivered. “I want to take my time.”

  Only one word came to her mind. “Please.”

  “Just wait,” he murmured.

  She ran her fingers down his spine, nestled between the hard muscles of his back. Feeling a tremor run through him, she stopped. Her lips brushed his collarbone as he grazed her neck with his teeth. She gasped as his mouth closed over her skin, pinching slightly, but making her body tingle in anticipation.

  Lex pulled away and looked down at her.

  “God,” he said; his voice almost a moan.

  “What?” she breathed.

  “You’re just...so beautiful.”

  Lex’s mouth returned to her body, moving lower to find its way over her trembling chest, kissing along her hip bones and sliding her shirt away from her stomach, undoing her jeans with one hand. His other hand kept her pinned to the bed, his fingers spread on her abdomen.

  Lex moved even lower and his lips touched her again. She opened her mouth in a silent moan. Her body tingled and she squirmed. Lex’s hand on her stomach held her fast. She touched the soft waves of his hair and closed her eyes, his tongue exploring her most sensitive of areas.

  She felt the wave growing inside her, her body clenching in ways that she had never felt before. Her breathing became heavier, and her hand tightened, pulling Lex’s hair. He moaned into her, the vibrations creating even more sensations.

  “Please,” she gasped, “Don’t stop.”

  Lex increased his pace, his fingers joining his mouth as extra stimulation.

  The wave rose inside of April, nearing a peak, and then crashed, drawing a moan from between her lips and causing her upper body to rise from the bed. She dug her nails into his shoulder, biting her lip to curb the scream that was threatening on the tip of her tongue. Her body clenched, riding the wave as it slowed, revelling in each moment that the feelings coursed through her body, gripping it in a fist of sensation.

  Lex looked up at her as the wave began to lessen. He smiled slightly and moved up to her face, sliding his body along hers as he did. His lips touched hers and he tasted sweet. She watched as he deftly unbuckled his pants and slid them off, letting himself free of his boxers. April’s eyes widened slightly and she gripped his arms. Lex lowered himself onto her and she tipped her head back, her mouth opening in a sigh.

  As she heard the wind in the trees around them and felt Lex’s body begin to press into hers, she thought, this is going to be...magic.

  The evening of day five, the group approached the ranch. The air was cool and the apprehension was building inside April. Part of her reveled in the secret affair, finding the excitement almost palpable. But the other part felt the guilt that was slowly eating away at her, for lying to her father. Now she would have to lie to her mother as well, which was never an easy task.

  After untacking in the corral, April turned Chinook into the paddock, where he could cool down before being let into the main field to graze with the other horses. She headed inside, careful to avoid her mom who was busy in the kitchen. Once up in her room, she waited for the dinner bell to ring.

  When it finally sounded, she gathered around the table with everyone else. Only Lex was missing, and only one seat was empty; the one right next to hers.

  “Tell me everything,” her mother said, as Lex sat down.

  He bumped April’s foot and she fought not to look at him, watchful of her mother’s observant gaze.

  As Hailey began relaying the many stories of the week to April’s mom, April sneaked a glance at Lex. He smiled and looked at her out of the corner of his eye. His face was slightly flushed and the pink in his cheeks reminded April of the previous night and the heat that had circulated inside the tent, making her skin moist. She could almost feel his hot skin pressed against hers and she squirmed in her seat, making her fork clatter as she dropped it onto her plate, captured by the daydream.

  “April?” her mom said, “Honey, are you okay?”

  April nodded, her cheeks flaming. Her mom raised her eyebrow. April looked down at her meal and didn’t look up for the rest of the night.

  After dinner, she offered to clear the table. She tuned out the conversation in the dining room and let her mind drift to Lex and the way her heart sped up whenever he crossed her mind. She felt herself smiling. She felt as light as air when she thought about him.

  “Hey beautiful.” A voice behind April made her jump. She shook her head and turned away from the sink. She smiled at Lex’s cheeky expression staring down at her.

  “Well, hey there ,” she said.

  Lex wrapped his arms around her waist and held her tight to him, so that her body touched every angle of his, all the way down to her toes. He looked deep into her eyes and she could imagine the mood he was in; his eyes were shining.

  “I felt bad for you, cleaning up all alone.” Lex kissed the tip of her nose.

  “I don’t mind,” she said.

  Lex’s face dropped for a second. He was thinking hard about something. “How do we meet tonight? I’m guessing I can’t just come to your room.”

  She stepped up onto her toes, trying to reach his lips with her own. He leaned back and held her at arms length. It was times like these that she felt so small beside him.

  “I’m serious!” he said.

  April chewed on her bottom lip and thought carefully. “How about the barn?

  “Not the most romantic of places.”

  “We have an excuse in case we are spotted; it’s not unusual for me to go to the barn in the middle of the night.”

  Kip walked into the room and the couple jumped apart.

  “Seriously, guys? I could have been the boss. You have to be more careful.”

  April looked at Kip and rolled her eyes dramatically.

  “The horses are hungry.” Kip took the dish cloth from her hand and gave her a small shove. “You,” he said to Lex, “can help me.” He handed him a dry towel.

  April headed to the barn, the horses greeting her from the corral. They wanted to be let out to pasture with the others.

  As she opened the gate, she anticipated the following day, the final day of Lex’s trip. She didn’t like thinking about saying goodbye to him, though he promised he would be back as soon as he could sneak away.

  April didn’t know what the ranch would feel like without Lex; his presence seemed so dominant. One thing she knew; nothing would be the same again. She felt altered in some way, irreversibly changed. Sometimes she wondered about what it would be like to live in the city, amongst the hustle and bustle, running everywhere, yet still late for everything. She wondered if the people there were ever curious about what it would be like to live in the country. She shook her head in confusion. No, it still seemed odd to her that people would choose to have backyards that touched, or a job that consisted of a cubicle and a boss that didn’t care about his employees.

  April looked around at the horses and the barn and breathed a sigh of relief at the cards she had been dealt. She was lucky to have been born into a family that liked the wilderness, believed in the importance of the little things and practised kindness to others just for the sake of being kind, not for any superficial reason. She smiled to herself. Tomorrow morning she would ride to the far gate on Chinook, breathe in the fresh cedar smell and thank the uni
verse for the life she had been given.

  Lex met her in the barn once she was done with the feeding.

  “What are you doing here so early?” April asked.

  “Everyone else already went to bed.”

  She looked towards the lodge. The lights were off.

  Lex wound his arms around her waist and kissed down her neck. April touched the smooth skin of his hands and wrapped her fingers around them, turning around to gaze up at him.

  They grabbed a blanket from the tack room and laid down amongst the aerated hay. Placing her head on his chest, she sighed, feeling the gentle lull of unconsciousness begin to take her. And for the first time in a long time, she slept a full night.

  Chapter 5

  The following morning, April woke up wrapped in Lex’s arms. She looked around at the rough interior of the barn.

  “Lex! Lex, wake up!” She shook Lex awake and jumped to her feet, grabbing her jeans.

  “What’s going on?” Lex said, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

  “C’mon, if we get caught we’re dead.”

  “We?” Lex laughed and stood up, stretching his shoulders. “I’m leaving today; you’re the one that will have to deal with your dad if he finds us.”

  April’s heart ached at Lex’s words and she bit her lip. Turning away and pulling on her sweater, she tossed him his jeans. “We need to go. Now.”

  After sneaking into the house, changing quickly and scarfing down her breakfast, avoiding her mother’s inquisitive eyes, April was ready to begin her day. She watched Cash load bags into the car as she tacked up Chinook in the corral. Jumping on, she received a suspicious look from Kip, who was working CrackerJack in the arena. She ignored him, nudged Chinook forward and left the yard. Lex wasn’t leaving until after lunch so April took her time getting to the far gate, running her farewell through her mind.

  The trees were so still once she was in the forest that she could hear the birds as if they were sitting on the saddle beside her. They sang along to each other, a perfect harmony to the sunshine beaming down. It was the first time she had ridden alone in what felt like months. Chinook was full of energy and she spurred him into a fast lope up the trail. She jumped a log that had fallen across her path and felt like she was about to take flight, a feeling she would never be able to give up.

  She reached the end of the trail and closed the gate so the cows couldn’t get into the autumn pasture just yet. She checked her watch. 11:00 am. Time to head back and face the goodbye that she had been dreading since the first time Lex had kissed her. She was still baffled that the arrogant, selfish man that she had met a week prior had disappeared and the real Lex Mitchell had showed through; a kind, gentle man.

  She arrived back at the ranch, still smiling. She tied Chinook to the rail and trod through the sand towards the yard.

  Her footsteps slowed.

  The yard was empty; no people loading luggage into vehicles. A cloud of dust lingered in the still air.

  She didn’t believe her own eyes. She frowned and found herself running into the house. Slamming doors, she jumped the stairs two at a time.

  She paused at the top of the first flight.

  There, it was quiet, too.

  Her stomach jumped and made her hurry the rest of the way up. Her heart was beating out of her chest. All she could hear was her own breath, rushing through her ears like wind against her ear drums when she rode fast through a field.

  She ran the rest of the way to Lex’s suite. The door was ajar and she pushed it open.

  The living-room was empty.

  April tried to ignore the heart pounding in her chest. She ignored the empty drawers and lack of clothing spread around the room. Lex had been packing, that was all. She ignored the smell of the citrus cleaner that they used as she passed through the living area, the small kitchenette and the closed bathroom door.

  She paused outside the bedroom. Breathe, she told herself.

  In.

  Out.

  In.

  Out.

  Slowly, she opened the door and almost dropped to her knees.

  It was empty.

  No Louis Vuitton bags piled against the wall. No messed up sheets. No book on the nightstand. And most importantly, no Lex.

  There was a folded piece of white paper on the corner of the bed. With shaking fingers and tears rolling down her cheeks, she unfolded it and took a breath that seemed to travel all the way down to her toes.

  It was a letter, addressed to her, written in Lex’s messy scrawl.

  Dear April,

  I’m so sorry. I wanted to say goodbye to you properly but didn’t have time. I didn’t get a chance to tell you everything I needed to tell you. All I wanted to do was to kiss you goodbye—but I couldn’t. I know you will read this letter and be angry with me, or with Cash. Please don’t be for long. Know that this isn’t a goodbye letter, April. You will see me again.

  I love you, April Cooper.

  I didn’t think I’d ever say that and mean it.

  This week has been the best week of my life because of you. For that, I thank you. I didn’t know my life was missing anything. But you saw something in me that no-one has bothered to look for before; you saw a real person.

  I wish I could tell you these things face to face and I swear I will one day, but the best I can do now is on paper.

  There’s something about you, April Cooper. You give me strength to be the man you deserve. And for you, I will fight to be that man. I want to make you proud, so that when I come back to you, you will want me by your side. Because that’s the only place I want to be. The only place I feel at home.

  I wish it didn’t have to end like this, but I make you a promise; I will come back to you. We will be together again.

  Lex

  The 2nd Installment in the

  Sunshine & Shadow Series

  Dear April

  Now available on Amazon